The Art of Communication - 5 Communication Tips

Strong communication is one of the most important factors in any successful relationship. Without healthy communication, trust, vulnerability, and intimacy can be lacking.

While you and your partner might have different communication styles, you can still find ways to effectively connect and express yourselves.

If you’re willing to prioritize communication in your relationship, you’ll likely find different methods and tips that work for you. If you’re unsure how to get started or know you need to improve your communication but aren’t sure how consider putting some of these helpful tips into practice.

1. Don’t Be Hurtful

You might think it’s cute or playful to put down your spouse. They might even laugh about it, too. Hurtful comments are just that — they hurt. Even if your partner laughs them off, there’s a good chance those comments are getting to them, which can create underlying tension or self-esteem issues.

Every conversation within your relationship should be approached with respect. It’s okay to joke around with your partner, but make sure you’re always doing so in a loving, kind, respectful way.

2. Be Clear About Your Boundaries

Boundaries are exceptionally helpful and healthy in relationships. They clearly define what you need and want, eliminating the need to read each other’s minds. You are open about what you will and won’t do.

Make sure conversations about boundaries are ongoing in your relationship. The things you need can easily change over time, and your partner deserves to know about those needs.

3. Use “I” Statements

Expressing your feelings to your partner is important. But if you’re feeling sad, frustrated, or upset, make sure you're not blaming them for all of your feelings. Instead of saying things like, “you always do this,” consider saying something like, “I feel lonely when you do this.”

By using “I” statements, you’re letting your partner know exactly how you feel (good and bad), so they can take action to either keep you happy or help you find a way back to contentment by changing some of the behaviors causing your frustration or sadness.

4. Be Positive

It’s not always easy to speak positively, especially when you’re having a bad day, or you’re frustrated with your partner. Being positive takes a lot of practice, and it’s something you might need to work on.

But, if you’re willing to put in that effort and you choose to look at your relationship through a positive lens, your communication with your partner is bound to be healthier. They’re more likely to have a positive attitude, in return, and while that doesn’t mean you should brush problems under the rug or never be sad or upset, it can help to change your perspective on your partner and your life together.

5. Be an Active Listener

Communication is a two-way street. Everyone wants to be heard. Everyone wants to be valued. If you want that from your partner, you have to be willing to give the same, in return. One of the easiest and most effective ways to do that is by being an active listener.

When your partner is speaking, don’t just hear them — listen. Ask questions. Repeat phrases. Use nonverbal cues to let them know you’re paying attention. Being an active listener will let your partner know that what they’re saying matters to you. It will help you feel closer as a couple, and they’ll be more likely to give you the same attention when you have something to say.

There are so many things you can do to improve communication in your relationship. But, if you’re looking for a good place to start, these tips can get you on the right track toward strengthening your bond and feeling more connected.

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